A Rough Patch
Kate and Sabrina are now 6 months old. To be honest, things are not going quite as smoothly and I am looking forward to moving through this phase. I finally sensed this when I mentally shifted from never believing my little angels would go through the terrible two’s (happy denial) to believing it is right around the corner (when it is really over a year away). Where to begin?
For starters, sleep has taken a hit in the past several weeks. While they still pretty much sleep through the night, they can’t seem to make it all the way to morning. Wake-us at 4am or 5am are becoming routine. As rough as this may be, it beats a 6am wake-up, because they often don’t go back once they’ve had 9 hours of sleep. This is related to the other challenge, which is that Kate sleeps astonishingly little overall for a baby. I estimate she may sleep 10-11 hours a day. If you’re lucky, you get 10 hours at night, and then an hour of naps in 20-40 minute increments at random times the day. Sabrina can usually be depended on for 10 hours at night, and a good 2-3 hours of naps throughout the day. The hard cold reality is that since Kate is a 9-hour sleeper, if I want 8 hours, I need to go to bed at the same time that she does.
(While I began writing this at 6 months, they are now 7 1/2 months and I am just trying to find time to finish the post. To be continued…)
I am going to just touch on a few topics, because it is exhausting to write about it all. Here is a summary:
Kate seemed to get separation anxiety soon after her 4-month birthday. If you’d come into a room and then start to leave, you’d see her smile soon turn to sad expression and soon after to tears. She also loves to be held all the time (who can blame her?), which is difficult when there are two other girls needing at least some minimal attention. Her cries are very intense, and the tone seems to range from desperation (Mommy has deserted me) to anger (how dare you put me down). Fortunately Sabrina is an easygoing baby and doesn’t seem to mind that Kate is being held more than she is. For the most part, if she cries something is usually wrong and it’s either that she’s hungry or that she’s tired. Sometimes she seems oblivious to what is going on around her. While Kate and Zoe tend to cry together – one prompting the other, Sabrina doesn’t see how that should impact her and just goes on with whatever she was doing.
At six months we started transitioning to jarred food from bottles, and that has not been as picturesque as I once imagined. I pictured all three girls seated at the same time and eating dinner, but the reality is that dinner time can be the most stressful time of the day. In the beginning babies need a lot of attention and encouragement to get through their meal, and if you try to do both at the same time, the one who is not receiving attention can get agitated, which makes it difficult to get more food in them. If you do one at a time, then the other who is waiting is often crying for a solid 20-30 minutes in the play area (if they’re hungry). You can intervene, but doing so risks the one who is being fed becoming cranky and then the outcome is a poor feeding.
Twin bonding has also not gone as well as I expected, given the smiles they gave each other at 2-3 months. Once they started rolling, they are rarely facing each other. Sabrina loves to be on the floor rolling, while Kate prefers sitting. So it is like their paths never cross, except occasionally when they happen to look each other’s direction and see that there is another baby in the vicinity – what a surprise! They also compete for toys, which shouldn’t come as a surprise but somehow did. Kate is usually the aggressor, wanting whatever Sabrina has. She can take her toys in the stroller, in their car seats, on the floor – she sees opportunity everywhere. Add to that, Zoe taking both of their toys and it seems like much of the day is spent being referree.
Add to all of this poopy diapers around the clock (John counted 7 for one baby one day) and feedings around the clock, combined with no regular naps and 9 hours (best case) of sleep, and it makes for an exhausted Mom.
